there's something within me that is begging to come out-
its clawing, scratching and building within me. i dont know if i am ignoring it out of fear or out of knowledge. maybe i know what it could mean. maybe this time i have thought so far out of the box that my mind has taken the shape of doubt. curious as it may be, i have censored myself for too long. the smile that you see me wear is clothing; soiled, i assure you. my emotions need a good scrub. my destiny needs a bit attention in the area of...well...everything. i feel like Jonah, quite frankly, -except that I am running away from something that I am not quite sure I am SUPPOSED to be doing, - I'm merely straying from a viable option.
my comfort zone is layered with the softest material you could imagine. the boundaries are clear and defined, and the border is riddled with defenses that keep both me in and anything that doesnt meet my specifications -out. i'm digging a hole in one of the walls unbeknownst to... me; getting my "Andy Dufresne" on, so to speak. i am fearfully and wonderfully made, so i am fearfully and wonderfully, -albeit slowly, making my way forward. there's no turning back now, i know...but can i look without turning into salt? I sure hope so.